About Lovism

Lovism is a mutual conversation for both sexes, a conversation meant to replace the current hostility and competitive antagonism that extremists have created between men and women.

By adopting unfounded and rigid perspectives, feminism has excluded ordinary men from all discussions about the relations between the sexes, while drifting further and further away from the wishes and dreams of most women. After feminism has implemented its separatist-antagonistic approach, in response to this self-centeredness and its impact, men’s groups, while bringing to light men’s issues, imitated the feminist separatism thereby fostering a similar reclusive attitude. The result, in which we all live today, is a divorce between the sexes.

All along, what women and men were looking for was not a conflict, but a shared and mutual discussion, for both of them, in which they could talk to one another. Not through blaming, intimidation and fear, as offered by feminism, but in mutual understanding and empathy. This is what Lovism is: A philosophy of equality for both sexes, based on conversation instead of confrontation, to replace the feminist dialect of intimidation and fear with a language of love.

Lovism is conversation as a paradigm. The conversation can and should take place on social media, in online forums, in public places such as universities or your local library or coffee shop or pub. Groups of men and women sitting together and opening up, not in order to blame, overpower or hurt as done in feminism, but to find empathy and to gain and create understanding. So that a broader culture of norms and codes founded on consideration in both directions could form, not by spreading fear, but based on love.

Lovism is the term for sexes-equality as the vast majority of men and women understand their equality –

  • as based on the realization that contrary to feminist dogma, the sexes are not identical, and therefore equality does not mean identical numbers in each and every realm separately through imposed sameness, but solely equal opportunity and equal cultivation, with acceptance of and respect for free will and personal choices, this respect meaning no punishment to any sex for the different proportions of men and women in certain domains resulting from their free will and personal choices;
  • as the appreciation that dictation by aggression and fear, used in feminism to impose its vision of sameness, will not better the relations between the sexes, but only listening in return for listening can achieve that, in a mutual and open conversation where both sexes can express themselves freely and equally;
  • and as the understanding that separatism from the other sex and silencing of the other sex as done in feminism do not produce listening, but on the contrary, can only generate in any person the very opposite – deafness and disengagement – and hence only a paradigm of mutuality and reciprocity can achieve what both sexes wish for.

More broadly and in a historical perspective, Lovism may be regarded as a name for applying the general principles of the universal framework for equality, that is, of humanism, to the relations between the sexes. Its introduction is motivated by the fact that as the universal framework of equality, humanism was formulated for the relations between the individual and the state, to secure equality in terms of equal formal legal rights, while leaving a gap in the personal side of human relations. This gap was tragically filled with women’s separatism (called Feminism) to be later ensued by men’s separatism in response to the female one. However, separatism is the splitting of humanity into “us” and “them”, which necessarily leads, as it does in feminism, to a supremacist view of “us” and a demonizing view of “them”. Both the female and male separatism phenomena were an ill response to the gap in humanism, causing the competitive hostility surrounding us today. Instead, the gap in humanism should have been addressed in the first place with a mutual perspective about the personal relations between the sexes. This is what the concept and term Lovism stands for and constitutes, to replace both separatist approaches with one shared framework based on mutual understanding and, ultimately, love.

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A note to the reader: Some marginal religious groups seem to have previously adopted the term Lovism to represent agendas unknown to this writer. None of those agendas are related to the term Lovism as used here. Lovism as described here is not a religious or a mystical term but a humanist term. The term is pronounced with the emphasis being on the letter O in the word Love: Love(ism), Love(ist).